Okay, so I know I had some nice and meaningful posts back in the beginning of the year. And things were going ok until my eczema came back with a vengence. Normally it's just on my fingers,but it was on the heels and balls of my feet and it was horrible. After trying every home remedy I went to the dermatologist and was put on prednisone...2 courses. I gained 8 lbs in a month!!! What's weird too is that I noticed only in retrospect what a pig I had been about eating. Truly inhaling anything. I forgot the effects that steroids have on the appetite. The last time I was on steroid therapy for my eczema (which 15 years ago was so bad I looked like a leper...all over my hands, fingers, arms to my elbows...horrible) I was really, really skinny so what ever pounds it put on me then, I probably needed.
So, I thought to myself that I needed to get back to eating mindfully. No more stuffing whatever in my mouth. I have to take little bites and really savor stuff. Also, I knew, being an unschooler to the core who balks at being told "I have to do" anything, that starting some 'diet regime' would only blow up in my face. I don't like it when someone says I can't have this, or my bloodtype is wrong for that, or carbs are bad, fat is bad, protein is bad, sugar is bad, dairy is bad. Geesh, I've got one life to live and I would like a little enjoyment!
I am really being aware of what I am eating, how it tastes and smells, and making sure I am eating lots of fruits and veggies (because stress/emotional/
bored eating tends toward the sugary, baked carby stuff). And when I do I have cookie or two, I eat them really, really slowly as if I am a toddler. Ever notice how it takes a toddler 15 minutes to eat one Chips' Ahoy?
Nothing is off limits, but I actually take the time to pause and think about what I am going to eat. Already I feel tremendously less bloated and in the last 10 days have lost 4 of the 8 pounds I put on. The thing is I really wanted to lose about 15 lbs prior to this steroid night mare, so I have jacked myself up to needing to lose 23 (or rather 19)lbs now.
Autumn and I walked to the park today to go to her pottery class. Unlike some of you on this list (Leonie, Cindy etc...) I really don't like working out. I still have really great muscle tone, just a jiggly tummy. I'm still a size 12/14 (US) and really would love to be an 8/10. I want to incorporate the exercise in to my life. I am not a gym-going-gal. I tried Curves and ended up losing hundreds of bucks coz it is just not me. I like swimming, but the pools aren't open yet. I like an occasional walk too. Now that the weather is nice, assuming I can keep my allergies under control, playing tennis with Autumn and Ben would probably be good. Plus, I really hate being hot and sweaty. I think it's a mental thing having lived in Florida, which I really didn't like at all, for almost 20 years. I am the kind of person who should live in the north and do winter sports.
I love the book Secrets of a Former Fat Girl. It's a great read. I also love the Fat Girls Guide to Life. Even though people might still not consider me a fat girl, I can relate to stuff they say. I was really quite thin up until the death of my mom. Nothing will put 20lbs on someone like depression/grief eating. I just know that if I don't 'pay attention' (because that really is what it is about for me) I will only get heavier and little bit at a time, year by year until I really am at a place that would be overwhelmingly upsetting to me. Plus, I am going to be 42 in 5 days. I am not getting any younger and time is not going to stand still either. So, I better get going!
So, just like I am into Mindful Learning, I am now practicing Mindful Eating. We will see how it goes.
Peace Out!